


Dear Mum

by WhiteravenGreywolf



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Clexa, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Epistolary story, F/F, Super mutant Lexa, Travelling Clarke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-02
Updated: 2018-02-02
Packaged: 2019-03-12 18:26:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 3,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13553055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhiteravenGreywolf/pseuds/WhiteravenGreywolf
Summary: After three months away from home, Clarke decides to write a letter to her mother, in hope to, perhaps, make peace. She promises to write again once she leaves Polis, and reaches Seattle. Only, a strange and reclusive girl keeps her in Polis. Modern AU. Clexa. Epistolary story.





	1. Letter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Cross-posted from Fanfiction.net  
> This is a weird story, but I hope you'll like it nonetheless!

Dear Mum,  
  
I don't know if you're still mad at me, but it's been three months now, and even I can't stay mad at you this long. So I wanted to apologize. I'm sorry I left just after our fight, I know we could have talked more. But I'm not sorry for leaving.  
  
I remember how you said that it was just a phase, that it would pass, and I would be once again interested in my studies. You even begged me to think it over. And I did. I've been traveling a lot, and it gave me a lot of time to think. Now I know for sure that I don't want to go back to school. I don't even want to find another school like you had suggested. I felt like I was trapped, and it was becoming hard to breathe. But now, I feel so much better.  
  
Maybe you don't understand how I can give up on college so easily, but for now, it's the right thing to do, I know it. I'll come back one day, and that day I'll know for sure what I want to do with my life, but in the meantime, I'll travel.  
  
Right now I'm in the quaint little town of Polis, in Washington. It's all snowy in here, and the town is surrounded by giant mountains, with huge trees as far as the eye can see. I couldn't afford a room in the only motel the town has, so I'm camping. But don't worry, I won't stay there for long, it's already planned. I'll take another bus for Seattle in a day or two, and I'll write you again when I get there.  
  
I hope you won't be mad at me even more for what I said, but I think we've been at war long enough. Now we should make peace. That's what I really want.  
  
Clarke


	2. Letter 2

Dear Mum,  
  
So, maybe I shouldn't tell you what I'm about to share because you'll start to worry. But I'm alright, you don't need to worry at all. So last night, right after I posted my last letter, I went to the diner to eat. It was raining when I came out, so I walked quickly to protect myself and not reach my tent completely drenched. But of course, I slipped, right in front of the small alley beside the diner. And just as I was standing back up, there was this creepy guy walking off the alley, laughing and all. I really thought he was just laughing because I had fallen, but then when he walked up closer I knew he was not a good person. So I got up as quickly as I could, but before I could do anything this girl appeared literally out of nowhere and beat the heck out of the guy. She was so fast it was crazy, and I couldn't really see her until the guy ran away, and she stopped moving.  
  
I thanked her, even though I could have handled it on my own the help of a professional fighter was always appreciated. So anyway, she really is a weird one, this girl. She doesn't seem to be older than me and she has those strange piercing green eyes. Plus she's so thin it's a wonder she was able to beat the guy up. She said it was nothing, and that she would take me back to my place. I said it was okay, but apparently, it wasn't a question, and she followed me all the way back to my tent. So after a while, I thought maybe I should ask her who she was because after all, she saved me. So her name is Lexa, and she lives somewhere close to the town, although she didn't tell me where she said I wouldn't find it. And then she got kind of angry when I wanted to ask more question, so I let it go for now.  
  
So, just as I said before, everything is fine. Lexa brought me back to my tent, and she went home, and the creepy guy never returned. Right now it's the morning after, and I'm really happy about my tent's waterproof ability, because I thought I would wake up in a small pool, but there isn't a drop of water inside. So yeah, that was my little joy of the morning. I'll go and post my letter now.  
  
Clarke


	3. Letter 3

Dear Mum,  
  
Lexa really is a weird, but very nice girl. Although she'll hate it if I called her nice. She pretends she's a badass but I see through her. So yeah, I found her again. We met at the diner actually. I had not seen her there the day before, but maybe because I usually take my breakfast later. But today is so cold I just wanted to go from one warm place to the other.  
  
I really hesitated, but I sat across from her and told her that I would treat her for breakfast as a way to thank her for yesterday. She said I didn't need to, I said I didn't mind, and we enjoyed a nice breakfast. Then she asked me if I wasn't too cold in that tent, and I told her it was okay since I'm leaving tomorrow anyway. After breakfast, she said she was going home, and I said that I was going to wander around town. I was so cold I probably looked pitiful, and Lexa said that it was okay if I wanted to see where she lived. So I followed.  
  
I still don't know if I should have come with her or not. We hiked for at least an hour, right through the forest until we reached the foot of the closest mountain. I have absolutely no idea how she managed to track her way home without a single sign, but she did it without stopping once. Thank god I have at least a little bit of endurance, or I feel like she would have abandoned me a long time ago. Also, an interesting fact, it's hotter in the forest than in town. Or maybe that's because we walked for an hour without interruption.  
  
Lexa leaves alone in this beautiful little wood cabin, with a big stone fireplace in the middle. It looks like a hut where hunters would regroup before a hunt. I asked her how she ended up with such a place and she didn't answer. That seems to be a normal thing with Lexa, not answering questions or not contributing to the conversation. Once during the trip, she noted I talk a lot. I told her she was a genius for noticing it, and she strangely took it as a compliment. I didn't have the heart to correct her.  
  
The inside is very sparse. A couch in front of the fireplace, a few books inside boxes, a bathroom and a room with a mattress on the ground and covered with covers and furs. At least she has running water. There isn't much to do at her place, so she just showed me around the woods, and she took me back to town before the sunset. I asked her why she lives on her own so far from everything, and of course, she didn't answer. She just left me back in town, told me to be careful from now on and have a safe trip to Seattle, and she left.  
  
Also, Lexa is one heck of a huntress. She hunted our lunch with a knife, which I thought I was going to be grossed out by, but it was actually pretty cool. I wish I could hunt like that too. No more money problem when I want to eat!  
  
I'll write you back in Seattle.  
  
Clarke


	4. Letter 4

Dear Mum,  
  
So please, don't be mad, but I stayed in Polis. But there is a good reason for that, Lexa is wounded. Like, badly.  
  
My bus was leaving in the early evening, so I decided to find Lexa to say my goodbyes before I left. Finding her house was actually a bit easier than I would have thought, and also I was pretty scared I would get lost. I actually found my way there eventually. Guess I'm good in the forest too. So I arrived at her cabin, and I found the door is slightly ajar, and there's blood on the handle. So, of course, I started to freak out, and I ran inside. Lexa was on the ground in front of her fireplace, her back to the couch. She wasn't very happy to see me there, she said I should just leave her, she was fine. But that wasn't the weirdest part. Her blood is black. I thought it was just because it had dried off, but no, it really is black, even when liquid. Of course, I asked her about it, and of course, she denied any answer.  
  
Fortunately, she had some materials I could use to clean her wound and bandage it. It wasn't as bad as I had thought, but the beast which had attacked her must have been pretty big, seeing the size of the claw marks she had on her shoulder. I asked her what it was, if there was some kind of bear which didn't hibernate or something, and she didn't answer. I put her to bed and promised I'll stay there until she woke up, just to see if she was better. Right now I'm waiting for her to wake up.  
  
I think I'm going to stay here until she heals. I want to make sure she's okay, and that the thing that attacked her won't come back. And get a few answers from her, if possible. But one thing I've noticed while I was taking care of her shoulder was the tattoo on her wrist. It's a bar-code, like the real one you see on a box or whatever in a supermarket. I really wonder why she had this tattoo made.  
  
Don't worry about me, I'll be fine, and I'll make sure Lexa's fine too.  
  
Clarke


	5. Letter 5

Dear Clarke,  
  
I just received a few of your letters, I don't know if there has been more since. First, I wanted to tell you that I'll respect your choice. You were right to say that I shouldn't have pushed you when it was clear you needed air. I hope you've enjoyed your travels so far, and that our fight hasn't weighted on you as much as it has weighed on me. I really wanted to apologize earlier, truly, but I had no idea on how to find you. So I really hope by sending this letter to Polis they'll give it to you the next time you post something.  
  
Now that I know where you are, and that you are okay, I feel better. I'm still worried, but at least I know you are enjoying yourself, and you are safe. Although the more I read about Lexa, and what you told me about her, and the more I can't help but think this all story will put you in more danger than you can handle. But I'm sure you already know that. You're a very smart girl, you probably figured it out already.  
  
So what I'm asking is that you stay careful, and leave when it becomes too dangerous. For once, don't be the selfless hero you've always wanted to be, but be selfish, and think about yourself. Please, be careful.  
  
You mother who loves you.


	6. Letter 6

Dear Mum,  
  
I'm being careful, I promise. Lexa hasn't answered many of my questions, but she is starting to open up a bit, which I consider a victory in my book. Her shoulder is healing nicely, but because of it she can't go hunting, so I have to make a trip back to town at least every two days. I've been sleeping on her couch for the past few days now. Of course, she's really mad at me for it, but I don't care. I just want her to feel better.  
  
I don't even know why I'll tell you what I'm about to say, but I guess you're the only one I have here, beside Lexa. I think I'm starting to care more for her than I should. I don't know how that happened, maybe when we were done arguing once again as to why I was still here, and she thanked me for taking care of her. It has to be it. Right now she's taking a nap, again. She says she hates naps but as soon as I tell her to rest she takes a nap. But anyway, I wonder what I'll do now. See if my feelings do confirm themselves, or maybe just ignore them, and leave once she's fine. I don't think I want to leave her.  
  
Clarke


	7. Letter 7

Dear Mum,  
  
Lexa and I have been talking a lot lately since there aren't many things to do in here. I know about her now, like the fact that she has a sense of humor really borderline, which would not make you smile at all. She also learned how to fight and hunt on her own, since, like she said, she didn't have a choice. I still don't know anything about her past, at all. She refused to tell me what this bar-code means, but she must have some pretty painful memories since she's frowning every time I ask about her past. I can only guess this is the reason why she leaves on her own in the middle of a snowy forest.  
  
I went to town this morning, and the strangest thing happened. I was at a grocery store when a long succession of black vans traversed the town, and I heard loud growling coming from those vehicles. You were right when you said this story was weird, but I don't want to leave without knowing the whole story. I'll ask Lexa about it when I'll come back later today. I think after caring for her like I did I deserve a few answers, even if I have to squish them out of her.  
  
Oh, I forgot to tell you, about the black blood, she answered me about it, well, kind of. She said she was born like that, and that it made her stronger and faster than a normal human being. That much I can believe, but the scientist in me is dying to know what this black blood is made of, and how she could be born with it.  
  
Clarke


	8. Letter 8

Dear Mum,  
  
So, I'm not at Lexa's right now, and I'm writing right after I sent you the other letter. I think I made a mistake, but I'm not sure if it is one, or if I did the right thing. I kissed Lexa. Ok, so no, let's start from the beginning.  
  
I went home and told Lexa about the vans, and she was freaking out, literally, like yelling me to leave, to go to Seattle before it was too late. I had never seen her show that much emotions all at once. She wasn't even angry, really, but she was worried, and afraid, and sad, too. So I told her that I wouldn't leave her because she still needed me. Her shoulder is not healed yet, it's still black, and I want to make sure she's going to be okay. So we argued, and then she asked me why I wanted to stay so badly, and I didn't think about it, and I just yelled back that I cared for her. And we were stunned for such a long time, but then she just kissed me, and I kissed her back, and I thought it was alright. But then she asked me to leave for my own safety. She begged me.  
  
It hurts, you know. Leaving her, it hurts me more than I ever thought it would. I don't know why I have to leave her, why she wants me to leave when it's clear she cares for me too. What should I do now? Just go, let her be, leave for Seattle and never think of her again? I don't think I'll even be able to. Not after today, not after I saw her panicking like she did, and I don't know why.  
  
I remember the story Dad always told me, about how he asked you out until you said yes, and when you didn't show up because you had a lot of work to do he purposefully hurt himself so you would take care of him. He told me that was the stupidest thing he ever did, but he was happy it had worked out. And he made me promise to never endanger myself for a boy. I suppose it applies to girls too, now. But in the story, I'm like you, I think. The one who needs to be taken care of is Lexa, and I can't leave her, not yet. I'll post this letter, and run back to her place.  
  
Nothing will happen to me, mum, I promise. I'll be careful, I'll be fine. I love you mum.  
  
Clarke


	9. Letter 9

Dear Mum,  
  
I arrived just in time. Lexa is wounded, again, this time at the thigh. Another claw mark, but this time I know why. I know how. She wasn't really happy to see me again, but she was glad in the end when I cleaned and dressed her wound like she couldn't have done. She asked me to leave, she said that others could come after her, but I refused, and I put her to bed. So she asked me to stay, and I held her until she fell asleep. When she woke up she finally told me what was going on.  
  
Lexa is the name she gave herself because they never bothered to give her one. She was an experiment the government worked on, in a facility hidden underneath one of the mountains around here. That's where her black blood and her bar-code tattoo came from. She escaped, and now they send monsters after her, some weird mutations of animals, to either kill her or bring her back, because they know a human being would not be capable of even harm her. That's why she leaves alone, in the forest. And she told me she had noticed me even before we met when I was just walking around the forest on my first day in town, and that was why she followed me back in town, and she was there to save me, and she was still there in the morning. Because she wanted to know me. Because as stupid as it may sound, she fell in love with me at first sight. I'm not quite there yet, but if she lets me then I'll stick around long enough to fall in love with her myself. It's what I really want right now.  
  
For now, I'll take care of her until she's healed, and then I'll ask her what do we do now. My idea is to take her away from this place, in another state, maybe, or another country if we need to. I heard Canada is a nice place to be. Whatever I do, I'll let you know.  
  
Clarke


	10. Letter 10

Dear Mum,  
  
I can't even fathom at how awful Lexa's childhood must have been. Her entire life for that matter. The more I learn about her, the real her, the more I want to protect her, and make sure from now on, she'll be happy. Her entire body is covered with so many scars, it's a wonder she hasn't died from an infection just yet. The worst looking one is on the nape of her neck. It looks awful, and when I asked Lexa about it she said she had to do it to herself, to take off the microchip they had placed along her spine. It's absolutely crazy.  
  
This will probably be my last letter for a long time. Lexa and I, we have decided to go, leave Polis forever, get as far away from the mountains as possible, in hope that they won't send other beasts after us. The good news is that Lexa isn't supposed to exist, so she probably isn't reported as a dangerous criminal or something like that. We'll take the bus tomorrow, right after I've posted this letter. I don't know when I'll be able to write again, so just know that I love you very much, and I'll come see you and introduce you to Lexa as soon as we can, that's a promise.  
  
Clarke

 

  
  
Dear Mrs. Griffin,  
  
Clarke doesn't know I have written this letter to you. I wanted to apologize for the fact that Clarke may be in danger because of me. I warned her, but she wouldn't listen. She has made up her mind, and it seems I can't make her change it. I promise you I'll protect her as best as I can, should we be in danger. I would lay down my life for her, and make sure she comes back safely to you. I'll take good care of her, I promise you.  
  
Lexa

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that was it! I hope you liked the story!


End file.
